Lawyer

Advice For How To Handle A North Carolina Divorce

Published on: March 25, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How long does getting a divorce take?”

A recent article discussed some great advice for those either considering divorce or in the midst of an ongoing split. The advice comes from the perspective of a family law attorney and is meant to ensure divorce litigants avoid some common pitfalls during the process. By trying to be mindful of the following issues you could go a long way to improving the overall divorce experience.

First things first, it is important that you keep your eyes on the prize. What is the prize? Divorce. When people begin the divorce process and meet with their family law attorney they almost always have a clear goal in mind. Divorcing with as little pain as possible, securing a workable custody arrangement and reaching an equitable division of financial assets. Sounds good. The problem is that as the divorce process kicks into gear it becomes easy to lose sight of these goals and instead become consumed with daily bickering. Rather than get bogged down in minutiae, try and keep your focus on your long-term goals and rise above the day-to-day squabbles; let your attorney worry about those things.

It is also important to understand that avoiding unnecessary fights is not the same thing as giving up. Some divorce litigants make the mistake of thinking that those attorneys who insist on fighting for every last cup and saucer are the good ones. They think this kind of behavior shows devotion or toughness. In reality, engaging in unnecessary arguments only pads their legal bill and wastes money you could use later when starting your new life. Though no one advocates being a pushover, a truly experienced attorney will know what things are worthy of a fight and what things aren’t.

Massachusetts Legislation Would Outlaw Sex Before Divorce Is Officially Over

Published on: March 20, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “I’m considering separating from my spouse; what actions should I refrain from doing?”

A bill in Massachusetts currently making its way through the legislature is aimed at reducing the instances of funny business between individuals who are in the process of divorcing. Specifically, the legislation would prohibit all sexual contact for divorcing spouses who live at home with their children until the divorce proceedings are finalized.

Even more ridiculous is that the bill says that for a parent to have sex he or she would first have to get a judge to sign an order approving the deed, something that many have said is downright preposterous.

The legislation specifically says that in any divorce or separation where there are children involved, the party remaining in the marital residence “shall not conduct a dating or sexual relationship within the home until a divorce is final and all financial and custody issues are resolved…” The only exception contained in the legislation is for cases where a judge has granted express permission.

The bill was originally introduced by State Senator Richard Ross back in early 2013 and failed to garner the support necessary to pass. This time, Ross says he thinks there is a chance the bill might earn enough support to get signed into law. Though Ross is the official sponsor of the bill, he curiously says he does not personally support it.

How To Avoid A Communication Breakdown With Your Family Law Attorney

Published on: March 18, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does a “No-Fault’ divorce mean in NC?”

A recent article in the Huffington Post discussed a common complaint that many clients have with their family law attorneys: a lack of communication. The article, written by a divorcee and now paralegal, offers insight into the problem as well as advice on how to ensure you don’t fall into an annoying trap of bad communication with your attorney.

In almost all aspects of life, communication is key. In fact, a breakdown in communication often contributes to many people’s decision to file for divorce in the first place. Given the time, money and stress involved in a divorce, you do not want to make an already tough situation worse by communicating badly with the one person who you’ve hired to help see you through the process.

Communication is critical during the North Carolina divorce process given how many sensitive issues need to be worked out before the divorce can be finalized. When communication breaks down between an attorney and his or her client, it can end up causing frustration on both sides as well as waste serious time and money.

Rather than wait for things to get bad and then having a meltdown over unmet expectations, the author of the Huffington Post piece suggests some proactive conversation with your lawyer from the very beginning to ensure communication lines stay open. To guarantee that you both are on the same page about how much communication is possible and the ways in which it should occur, it is a good idea to discuss communication procedures in your initial meeting with the lawyer.

Important Info About Divorce and Debt

Published on: March 13, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Do I need an attorney to get a Divorce in North Carolina?”

A recent article in the Huffington Post dealt with the issue of debt and divorce. Many people understand that when a couple in North Carolina files for divorce they must equitably divide their assets and liabilities (debts). However, what you may not realize is that the division worked out between you and your spouse does not alter the contract you signed with the company you owe money to.

The problem is that in cases where couples spend time hammering out detailed divorce settlement agreements regarding how debts will be divided, many are shocked to discover that the divorce decree does not have the power to change the agreements with creditors. This means that even though the divorce agreement clearly says your spouse will be responsible for the car loan or for paying the credit card debt, if he or she flakes, the creditor can turn around and come after you for the money (assuming your name was on the debt in the first place).

The reason is that divorce decrees are agreements between two parties, husbands and wives, and they have no legal force to change previous agreements made with third parties, such as credit card companies or mortgage lenders. This means that no matter how detailed your divorce decree is in assigning responsibility for marital debts, you will both be considered legally responsible for all common debt until it is either paid off or refinanced.

So how can things go wrong? The most common way that debt turns problematic is when one party either cannot or will not continue making the payments he or she agreed to make as part of the divorce settlement agreement. That means if your spouse stops paying the mortgage, the car note or the credit cards, you can find yourself in trouble given that the creditor will likely turn to you to pay the remaining balance of the loan, regardless of what your divorce agreement says.

Experts Say Pet Custody Battles On The Rise

Published on: March 11, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Does adultery affect who gets custody?”

Apparently it’s true what they say, dogs really are man’s best friends. And women’s best friends. Oh, and don’t forget about the cats. A recent survey of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers discovered that more divorcing couples are fighting over custody of their pets today than ever before.

Specifically, the survey found that 27 percent of lawyers say they have seen a rise in the number of people engaged in pet custody disputes during the past five years. Additionally, 22 percent of lawyers say that the judges across the country are more receptive to hearing pet custody cases. Another 20 percent of respondents said that courts instead preferred to treat pets only as assets, not willing to engage in conversations about custody.

Sadly, experts say that many instances of pet custody battles are often brought by one spouse as an attempt to gain leverage over the other spouse who actually has a deep attachment to the animal. In these cases, one spouse believes that by threatening to keep the animal for him or herself, it might be possible to extract other concessions from the pet-loving spouse.

The problem with this strategy (beyond the fact that it is sad and needlessly hostile) is that judges often see through this fight as it quickly becomes obvious which person truly does have the deeper connection to the animal. When this happens, it can end up making judges angry with the one spouse for wasting the court’s time on a frivolous matter.

New Jersey Judges Wrangle With Support For Adult Children

Published on: March 6, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What children’s expenses are not covered by child support?”

Several New Jersey courts have been contending with tricky issues surrounding divorced couples and continuing child support obligations. In one recent case, a family court judge from Morris County made national headlines when he refused to require a couple to pay for private school and college tuition for their 18-year-old daughter who had moved out of their home and now wanted financial support.

In a more recent case, a New Jersey appellate court ruled that a divorced dad was required to give his daughter more than $112,000 to pay for half of her $225,000 tab to attend Cornell Law School. Though most states do not require parents to continue supporting children past the age of 18 or graduation for high school, whichever occurs last, the judges in this case had no problem enforcing the payments on the father.

According to the panel of judges, the requirement to pay for law school would not apply in most New Jersey divorce cases, but does in this one because the parties specifically included such a clause in their divorce agreement. The judges pointed out that the father had negotiated the language of the settlement and was perfectly clear what his obligation would be.

Though parents may not have to provide this kind of support for their adult children, if they sign a contract agreeing to do so they cannot then expect to get out of it. The provision said that after the couple’s 2009 divorce, each would agree to pay half the cost of their daughter’s law school, assuming she maintained at least a “C” average.

Catholic Church Grapples With Messy Issue Of Divorce

Published on: March 4, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “I’m not getting along with my husband. We’ve been married two weeks and it was a mistake. Can’t I just get an annulment?”

To the surprise of many, the Pope has come forward and called for the faithful to have sympathy with those in the Catholic Church who have known the pain of divorce. Rather than condemn those whose marriages failed, Pope Francis asked the clergy and Catholics around the world to walk hand-in-hand with those who have felt the pain of failed love.

Pope Francis spoke during a daily mass at the Vatican and called on followers to avoid criticizing those who have gone through a divorce. Instead, followers are asked to remain close to them during their times of need.

The Pope’s remarks come at a sensitive time in the Catholic Church, when many are asking for a reexamination of the church’s position on the issue of divorce. Currently, those who have been divorced and not received an annulment are not allowed to take part in Communion, a holy and integral part of a Catholic service. Though these rules still exist technically, in reality they are rarely enforced at the local parish level.

Many in the Church are looking to Pope Francis to modernize some Catholic dogma, specifically issues relating to remarriage. Should the Pope decide to end the ban on receiving communion, many believe it would lead to broader questions and possible changes to how Catholics view marriage today.

Marc Anthony Forks Over Tens Of Thousands A Month In Support

Published on: February 27, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How is the amount of child support decided in North Carolina?”

Marc Anthony is in the middle of fighting a bitter child support case against his ex-wife and former Miss Universe contestant Dayanara Torres. Torres claims that Anthony should be paying far more each month than he currently is due to a huge boom in the Latin singer’s income.

According to court papers, Torres says that Anthony is currently paying her $13,000 per month in child support. However, she says that recent financial disclosures by Anthony reveal that this is far less than he ought to be paying given his increased earning power since their divorce was negotiated back in 2004.

As part of the child support fight, Anthony was required to fill out new paperwork regarding his income and assets and it shows that he is doing quite well for himself. Anthony claims to earn a total of $1.25 million per month and says that he is worth $20.8 million. Anthony credits income from record sales, concert tours and his clothing line at Kohl’s for the financial success.

Torres argues that because Anthony is now making much more than he was when they initially divorced, her children should benefit in the form of increased child support payments. Torres wants the support to increase dramatically, from $13,000 to $112,000 per month. Anthony balks at the figure, saying that he pays Torres more than enough money to comfortably provide for the children.

South Carolina Among The Most Difficult States In The Country To Get A Divorce

Published on: February 25, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How long does getting a divorce take?”

Those residents of North Carolina who find themselves trapped in unhappy relationships should count their lucky stars. Why? Because at least they don’t live in South Carolina.

The problem with South Carolina, at least for those trapped in bad marriages, is that the state is among the hardest to get a divorce in. According to a recent article in the Huffington Post, the total minimum process time for a divorce in South Carolina clocks in at a whopping 450 days. How long is this comparable to other places? Long enough to rank South Carolina as the fourth-slowest state for securing a divorce.

Another report on the subject of divorce ranked South Carolina abysmally with regard to ease of divorce, giving the state only 27 out of 100 points, a score low enough to make it fourth worst. There are several factors that combine to complicate the process of divorce in South Carolina.

Studies Show Divorce Filings Reach Peak In March

Published on: February 20, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Can any attorney help me with my family law needs in North Carolina?”

Though no one knows for sure why it happens, experts say that the period between New Year’s and the end of March often sees a noticeable jump in divorce filings. Whether it’s the stress and expense of the holidays, the generally gloomy weather or the forced romance associated with Valentine’s Day, January through March has earned a reputation as the season of divorce.

Beyond mere anecdotal evidence, an analysis by the legal website FindLaw.com found that divorces spike every January, continue to increase in February and finally reach their peak in late March. After March, the divorce rate drops off noticeably.

Beyond those filing for divorce, there’s a similar increase in the number of people searching for divorce-related topics online. FindLaw says that the numbers of searches for phrases like “divorce” or “child custody” jump by more than 50 percent from December to January and continue to gain steam through March.