Articles Tagged with Adoption

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “When do you get alimony?”

Everyone knows that divorce can be an emotional and exhausting experience. The end of a marriage, dividing up time with your children and splitting assets can bring out the worst in most people. The anger and pain associated with divorce can lead people to make unfortunate decisions that make an already bad situation much worse. The following are some examples of mistakes that North Carolina couples should work hard to avoid.

First things first, don’t use divorce as a way of seeking revenge. Though you might be understandably upset and even feel like the wronged party, using divorce to punish your former spouse is not a good idea. Demanding unnecessary depositions or filing frivolous petitions with your family court judge might make you feel better in the short term, but in the long run it will only succeed in driving up the overall cost of your divorce. If you are angry and hurt, it is a far more constructive use of your time and money to pay a therapist rather than drag out expensive litigation with your ex.

Another mistake that some people make when going through a North Carolina divorce is to overextend themselves financially. Divorce is notoriously costly and when you factor in things like alimony, child support and the costs of running two homes on the same amount of money that used to run only one, things can quickly get exorbitant. Those going through divorce need to be mindful of the costs associated with the process and be especially thoughtful before making financial commitments. Though you might want a flashy new apartment or car, make sure that you don’t enter into such decisions without first carefully examining your budget.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “I’m not getting along with my husband. We’ve been married two weeks and it was a mistake. Can’t I just get an annulment?”

Former NFL star Terrell Owens has a reputation for being difficult. Former teammates and coaches have long complained about his behavior on and off the field. According to recent reports, his difficult personality may also extend to relationships, with news coming out that his wife of only two weeks is preparing to file for divorce.

Owens married Rachel Snider, a former postal worker from Texas, two weeks ago. Snider, who has a daughter from a previous relationship, has apparently already grown weary of Owens’ antics and is preparing to move out of their home and file paperwork to end the marriage.

According to sources close to the couple, Snider says she has come to believe that Owens only married her because she had good credit. Owens has been struggling publicly with financial problems in recent years, suing his manager last year for millions he says he is owed. Snider claims that because of his financial mess, Owens was unable to get approval for a loan to buy a house. Almost immediately after the marriage was official, Snider claims Owens used her credit to secure the $2 million loan for a house in Sherman Oaks, CA.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does a “No-Fault’ divorce mean in NC?”

Bucking a trend that has taken place across the country for more than half a century, one legislator in Kansas is trying to roll back the clock and eliminate the state’s no-fault divorce option. The move to eliminate the no-fault option would return Kansas to the way divorces were handled decades ago, with spouses forced to pin the blame before the divorce would be finalized.

State Rep. Keith Esau says that he is backing the measure in an attempt to make it more difficult for couples to divorce. He says that it’s far too easy for husband and wives to split, simply claiming incompatibility when they tire of staying married. Esau says he believes that divorce should be much harder and that by erecting barriers to divorce, some marriages might be saved in the process.

According to Esau, a no-fault divorce provides an “easy out” for couples and allows them to avoid working at improving their marriage. Since proposing the measure, Esau says his office has been inundated with phone calls from citizens across the state that are unhappy with the proposal. Esau says he’s been shocked to discover how unhappy some people are with his legislation, but claims that he will not change his mind.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does uncontested divorce mean?”

Everyone knows that divorces can become nasty. Couples who used to be madly in love begin harboring small bitterness, engaging in fights over all kinds of things: the house, dishes, pictures, retirement accounts, etc. One British divorce case takes this kind of squabbling to a new level, with the woman claiming that she’d like to retrieve the kidney she donated to her soon-to-be ex-husband.

The story recently appeared in the Huffington Post, which said that Samantha Lamb, a 41 year-old mother of one young child, donated her kidney to her husband back in 2009. Lamb says that she was willing to do whatever she could to save her husband’s life, even agreeing to lose a large amount of weight prior to the procedure to ensure she was healthy enough to survive the operation. Lamb then underwent a kidney transplant operation, a painful procedure that took months to fully recover from.

Lamb says that after her husband recovered it didn’t take too long for her husband’s appreciation to diminish. Despite saving his life, she says her husband, Andy, had grown unhappy. Lamb says she believes Andy became so unhappy that he might have actually cheated on her, though she doesn’t have definitive proof of the affair.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How can an attorney help me with my Divorce or Separation in North Carolina?”

Though marriage vows specify that a couple’s commitment is intended to last through good times and bad, richer and poorer, new numbers indicate that as the economy continues to improve many couples may decide to throw in the towel and leave their unhappy relationships.

According to recent numbers published by the Population Research and Policy Review, the number of divorces decreased dramatically during the worst of the recession. However, the numbers have begun to rise again. Between 2009 and 2011, data shows that around 150,000 fewer divorces took place than otherwise would have been expected.

Some groups noted this drop in divorce rate was a kind of silver lining to the recent recession. They attributed the decline to the fact that families undergoing financial stress had drawn closer together, with husbands and wives increasingly relying on one another given the tough times.

While this may have been true for some, many others simply put off their divorce until they were able to afford it. Now that the economy has begun to recover, families that were afraid of the financial stress might now feel more comfortable with the thought of splitting up. Researchers say the same thing happened during the 1930s, when the divorce rate dropped dramatically and later recovered as the economy improved. Surveys showed that people were no happier in their marriages; they just feared the uncertainty that divorce might bring.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Do I need an attorney to get a Divorce in North Carolina?”

For those of a certain era, the divorce of Toni Tennille and her husband, Daryl Dragon, will come as sad news. The duo are known better by their stage names, Captain and Tennille, and recorded some big hits from the 1970s including “Love Will Keep Us Together” and “Muskrat Love.”

The couple announced their divorce on their website, saying that even after 40 years together, feelings began to change and evolve and it no longer felt right to remain together. Though the announcement felt like the decision was mutual, Dragon has since spoken to a reporter who he told that he still doesn’t understand the reason for the divorce and is trying to get to the bottom of his wife’s unhappiness. While the divorce is ongoing the two will remain together under the same roof.

Reporters who have analyzed the divorce filings are speculating that health issues may have something to do with the divorce given an odd mention of health insurance in the petition for divorce. It was announced back in 2010 that Dragon was diagnosed with a degenerative neurological disorder that is similar to Parkinson’s and which leads to extreme tremors. Many wonder whether the strain of the health problems or the expense of the health insurance may have played a role in the divorce, though neither Dragon nor Tennille would comment.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “When do you get alimony?”

A tragic divorce out of Florida turned deadly this past week when police got a call from a frantic father that his wife and two teenage children were dead. An investigation has since revealed that Jennifer Berman killed herself along with her 16-year-old son and 15-year-old daughter.

Investigators say that things began on Monday morning when Richard Berman received an email from his ex-wife saying that she felt like harming herself or other family members. Richard got in his car and drove over to his wife’s home and was devastated to discover that his family was already dead.

Initially, officers say they interviewed Richard and quickly ruled him out as a suspect. Additional investigation centered on Jennifer, with police concluding she was responsible for the deaths of the children and her own suicide. Police then set out to uncover a possible motivation for the murder/suicide and believe that the stress of the divorce, especially financial, may have played a part.

Richard and Jennifer officially divorced in December after a long and tense separation. The two were still listed as owners on the house where Jenifer and the children were found. Records show the property has been in foreclosure since 2010. In addition to the stress of the home, officials say Jennifer was financially devastated by the divorce and was struggling to pay the bills.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What children’s expenses are covered by child support?”

Divorce can be painful or it can be a tremendous relief, sometimes it can even be both at the same time. Given how emotional the divorce process is, it’s no surprise that people react in very different ways. That’s because divorce is an incredibly personal process. Having friends or family offer what they think are helpful bits of advice can actually lead to even more frustration, as outsiders attempt to generalize the specifics of your marriage.

A recent article in The Huffington Post discusses one woman’s perspective on her divorce and lists some of the most irritating pieces of advice she was given by friends and family members. Though they may have been meant to be helpful, the author of the piece explains that they were often maddening and perpetuated wrongheaded views of divorce.

One of the first irritating bits of advice listed in the article is that it is normal for divorce to be adversarial. Though this idea has become conventional wisdom, the author of the piece explains that it is simply not true for all couples. Though divorce can often be stressful, couples are frequently able to put their hurt feelings aside for the good of their children and behave like the adults that they are. Assuming that divorce will always devolve into a war often is a self-fulfilling prophecy and should be avoided at all costs.

Another bit of advice that got under the author’s skin was that when people say that broken marriages, like other things, should simply be fixed. The problem with this overused line is that it oversimplifies the complexities of marriage. Relationships are not broken down water heaters that can simply be repaired with a bit of hard work. Divorce should not be viewed as the easy way out, it is a very difficult process for most everyone and requires a lot of strength to make the decision to leave a bad marriage. Just because you chose to leave your marriage does not make you a quitter.

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Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does uncontested divorce mean?”

A prominent surgeon at the M.D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, TX is in hot water after being accused of working with an IT specialist to electronically monitor his wife while the two were going through a bitter divorce.
Back in 2011, authorities claim that Dr. Steven Curley began working with a hospital IT specialist to install spyware programs on his former’s wife’s computer. The software that was installed on the woman’s computer is called eBlaster and is available for only $99. The program works by recording keystrokes to capture emails, passwords, web searches and Internet history.

The wife began suspecting that she was being monitored after the divorce was over and took her concerns to authorities. Investigators slowly built a case and a grand jury was empaneled to consider the matter. Ultimately, Dr. Curley and the IT analyst, Hank Lehmann, were both arrested on felony charges.

Since the charges were filed, Dr. Curley has left M.D Anderson and has moved to Baylor College of Medicine where he now serves as chief of surgical oncology. Dr. Curley’s attorney says that his client wants to fight the charges, but is afraid that media attention surrounding the accusations will harm his career.

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