Charlotte Divorce Lawyer Blog

Divorce Lawyers in Charlotte, North Carolina :: What NOT to do During Your Divorce

Published on: October 9, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

As discussed in a recent article on PsychologyToday.com, there are several things you should NOT do during your divorce. As many people know, divorcing can be a stressful and exhausting experience. However, there are actions that can and should be taken to make the process easier and there are also things that can be avoided to ensure you don’t make a bad situation even worse.

The following are some of the things (though there are many, many more) that you should avoid doing in the interest of having a more peaceful divorce.

1) Don’t Lie To The Judge: Though this seems to go without saying, always tell the truth. Whether you’re testifying in court or in a deposition, credibility is key. If people start to doubt you then things go end up very badly. Make sure to confide in your attorney if there is a certain subject you want to avoid discussing, but outright lying is never a good plan.

2) Don’t Lie to Your Attorney: Your lawyer can’t help you if they don’t know all the facts. You should be honest with your attorney so they can accurately analyze your case for strengths and weaknesses. All the facts are important and your attorney needs to know everything to help you get the best possible outcome.

3) Don’t Take Legal Advice From Friends and/or Family: It’s important to remember that just because someone gives you advice, it doesn’t mean they are correct. The law varies wildly based on specific circumstances of your case so a friend or family that went through a divorce may have had an entirely different experience than you. Listen to your attorney and ask questions as they arise. It’s wise to avoid talking about specifics of your case with friends and family.

4) Don’t Hide Property: Hiding property to avoid equitable division in a divorce is quite simply a terrible idea. If you do so and it’s discovered then you will lose all credibility in front of the judge and the other side, likely making your situation much, much worse.

Equitable Distribution Lawyers in Charlotte, North Carolina :: What Happens to Small Business Debt in Divorce?

Published on: October 4, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

If a spouse mixes business with personal life, for instance, by using a personal credit card for business matters, the result will likely be no different than what would happen if it were a personal credit card in a divorce. Despite the fact that the card is tied to business and relate to only one spouse, both spouses may still end up responsible for the payments.

If the debts occurred in order to help a business which created an income for the spouse, they will likely be considered a “marital obligation.” If a judge finds the debt and its amount to be reasonable and if there are no other business assets to offset the amount of the debt, it could very well end up being shared as part of the equitable division process that takes place in every North Carolina divorce.

Divorce Lawyers in Charlotte, North Carolina :: Study Shows Correlation Between Shared Chores and Higher Divorce Rates

Published on: October 2, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

A recent study out of Norway revealed that divorce rates are higher among couples who equally share the housework than in those where the woman does the bulk of the chores. The bizarre findings indicate that the divorce rate among couples who shared housework equally was around 50% higher than among those where the woman did most of the work.

The author of the study, Thomas Hansen, said that the results show that equal responsibility for housework does not necessary contribute to a happy home. The author responsible said the fact that equality and happiness did not correlate came as a surprise to him. “One would think that break-ups would occur more often in families with less equality at home, but our statistics show the opposite.”

The reasons, though, have little to do with the chores. One possible explanation is the importance of defined roles in the family. These very clear roles help avoid situations where one spouse steps on the other’s toes, giving each an area of control. By not having overlapping household responsibilities, there’s less friction over chores and thus less arguments.

Child Support Enforcement :: Police Use Facebook To Find Delinquent Dad

Published on: September 27, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

We have previously written (Divorce in Mecklenburg County, NC and Facebook) about the dangers associated with Facebook when it comes to divorce, but we have never talked about the impact Facebook can have on child support arrangements. It’s common knowledge that these days North Carolina courts and law enforcement agencies are aiming to ensure that parents who owe court-ordered child support fulfill their financial obligations.

Obligors who fail to pay may be charged with contempt of court. If payments become severely delinquent, law enforcement and governmental agencies can sometimes step in and garnish wages, suspended a drivers’ license, or even put the delinquent parent in jail.

While child support is usually handled at the state level, the federal government sometimes gets involved in special situations, including when the debtor crosses state lines to avoid paying child support. In a recent federal case involving felony charges for unpaid child support, authorities succeeded in tracking down the debtor using a tool that is becoming increasingly common in such cases: Facebook.

The man is a native of Milwaukee, Wisconsin, but now lives in Southern California. He was ordered to pay child support for his daughter but allegedly has not made any payments since 1996. In 2008, authorities charged him with six felony counts of unpaid child support, and he now reportedly owes over $100,000 in past due support payments.

Investigators recently learned of information concerning the man’s location only after filing a search warrant related to his Facebook information. The social media site contains such a wealth of user-provided personal data that it is often seen as a valuable tool in criminal investigations as well as civil cases.

Equitable Distribution Attorneys :: Property Division can be Difficult in North Carolina Divorces

Published on: September 25, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

When it comes to separating assets, especially emotional ones, reaching an agreement that works for everyone can be tricky. For liquid items, such as bank accounts and retirement accounts, the division can be far less difficult due to a cash value already being attached to them. However, for many North Carolinians, figuring out a fair asset division when it comes to personal property can be far more frustrating.

In many cases, a couple will have acquired some unique items throughout the course of their marriage. These items can be difficult to split unless an agreement is reached. However, if both parties wish to remain in possession of the unique item and find themselves at an impasse, there are several ways in which a division can be achieved.

The easiest of all methods is to force a sale of the item and to split the proceeds. This allows each party to receive a fair share of the value of the item. However, for those who wish to keep the item, a common way to do so would be to offer to buy out the other spouse of their share. If things are extremely contentious, however, and both parties refuse to compromise on who gets the item, a judge may have to step in and determine what should happen.

Top Ways to Lower Your Attorney’s Fees

Published on: September 20, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

The following five things are some ways that you can try to keep your attorney’s fees low while going through the expensive process of divorce (from WiseGeek.com).

1. Think before you call
While your family law attorney is there to guide you through the process of a divorce and understands that you are going to have questions about the process, it’s important to understand that every communication with your attorney will result in being billed. Thus, it’s a good idea to save your small questions for a weekly status email with your attorney. This does not mean you should avoid communicating important information to your attorney, just think twice before you send off a quick email or make an unnecessary call asking for information that could be found elsewhere or saved for another time.

2. Be active in your own case
Family law cases require the production of lots of document. This can include financial documents, photographs, timelines of events, etc. It’s wise to help out your attorney where possible so he or she does not have to spend time (and money) trying to extract information from you. Provide whatever documents you think may be useful to your case and be quick to get back to them if they have questions.

3. Therapists are cheaper than attorneys
Going through a divorce can be an emotional rollercoaster ride and your attorney certainly understands the pain you are going through. That being said, attorneys are best used as advisors, not as sounding boards for your emotional issues. Good attorneys will be supportive and lend an understanding ear, but you should realize that their time equates to your money. It’s much better to turn to your friends or family to vent about your ex than be billed by your attorney.

4. Respond to requests quickly
There are multiple aspects of your family law case that are time sensitive. If your attorney sends you a document and tells you it needs to be notarized or that discovery requests need to be filled out and that a deadline is important, it’s critical to respond quickly. Your delay can mean that the attorney has to make several attempts to contact you or spend time getting extensions, all of which will end up being billed to you.

Several Strange Marriage Laws From Across the Country

Published on: September 18, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

With all the talk of alimony and custody fights, sometimes a little lightheartedness is appreciated. After all, you’ve got to laugh to keep from crying. In that spirit, the following list of bizarre marriage-related laws on the books in states across the country is meant to inject some humor into an otherwise serious subject.

First things first, in Kentucky, it’s apparently illegal to remarry the same person four times. Why four and not five? The reason is unclear, but I suppose it makes sense that if you haven’t been able to make it work the three previous times, what’s the point in giving it yet another go. Thankfully, as long as it’s different men, you can get married and divorced as many times as you like.

Wichita, Kansas represents an unlikely haven for those husbands who just can’t stand their mothers-in-law. The city has a law on the books which says that a man’s mistreatment of his mother-in-law cannot serve as a grounds for divorce. Though it can’t be used as a basis for divorce, no one thinks making an enemy of your wife’s mother is a good plan for a happy marriage.

California, Colorado, Montana, and Texas, allow for a very odd practice known as marriage by proxy. Marriage by proxy occurs when someone stands in for a bride or groom who is unable to be present at his or her wedding. The states that allow the practice limit it to members of the U.S. Armed Forces, a group who truly would be unable to attend in certain circumstances. Montana takes it a step farther and is the only place in the country where double-proxy weddings are permitted. This means that neither the bride nor the groom needs to be present for an official wedding to take place, something that would make for an odd reception.

Benefits of Lump Sum Alimony in Charlotte, NC

Published on: September 13, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

The family law practice area has seen the current economic climate lead to a huge increase in the number of modifications for existing child support and alimony awards. People are losing jobs, losing homes, taking pay cuts, losing bonuses and other compensation that was previously used to determine such financial support awards. This can be an especially big problem in cases where one party has received an alimony award and relies on those monthly payments to meet their basic living expenses.

If someone retires, gets injured, loses their job or is otherwise unable to make alimony payments, and your alimony is not designated as “non-modifiable” you may very well receive a discounted alimony payment on an ongoing basis or it may be eliminated all together. Even if the alimony award is non-modifiable, if the person responsible for making alimony payments loses a job and has no assets or means to pay, your chances of being able to hold someone in contempt for non-payment of alimony are slim. Given those potential concerns and the current state of our economy, those who are entitled to any form of alimony really should consider the idea of “lump sum” upfront payments so that they can avoid the issue of an alimony award being terminated or reduced based upon unfortunate circumstances arising in the future.

If there are assets, especially cash assets, available during the initial divorce proceeding it makes sense to at least consider how much of those assets could be distributed to you in a settlement in exchange for a reduced alimony payment. No one knows what the future holds and getting your money up front is a way to reduce potential risk down the road. Lump sum alimony does come with the responsibility of being smart with the money you get up front and making sure the lump sum lasts. This requires you being savvy and meeting with a financial planner or other adviser to manage your money properly.

Child Custody Cases in Iredell County, NC are Hard Enough, but What about the Dog?

Published on: September 11, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

As everyone knows, child custody is one aspect of divorce that can cause terrible bitterness and turn an otherwise amicable split into a drawn-out, expensive battle that leaves everyone battered and bruised, including the kids. The only good thing about child custody disputes is that they operate on an established set of laws and case precedents.

As discussed in an article on LATimes.com, determining who should get custody of the family pet is a totally different story. Pets are still viewed as property by the courts, even though many couples regard them much more personally. Because there are very few rules when it comes to deciding who should get custody of the pets, there is a wide variance among judges. Couples cannot assume a judge will make the decision based on who brought the pet into the relationship, nor can they count on the same elaborate factors being assessed that are considered when deciding child custody. In the olden days some judges would rely on “calling contests,” in which the spouse who could get the dog to come to them won custody. Far from scientific, courts have moved away from that process today.

So what are the options for spouses caught in a battle over your pet pooch? According to the LA Times, one possibility is to do what people with human children do, and work out a joint custody agreement. With a little extra work, both of you can keep taking your pride and joy to the dog park. Another benefit is that with shared custody you can always ensure there is someone around to look after your dog if you have to leave town.

This obviously won’t work if you and your ex will be geographically separate. If that’s the case, then you will need to do an honest evaluation of who is better equipped to take care of your pet. Who will be away from home more, which one of you has traditionally done most of the caretaking and, if you do have kids, how will child custody affect the decision.

Child Support Statistics Reveal What People Pay Across the Country

Published on: September 6, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Parents sometimes wonder if the payments they make for child support are fair. They wonder what their friends are paying and what number average families across the country face when it comes time to write a check. Non-custodial parents may be curious to know if the support they pay is in line with other parents in the same position.

Well wonder no more; the U.S. Census Bureau recently released a new report titled “Survey of Income and Program Participation,” which examines child support statistics gathered from across the country. The data used to compile the report was pulled from the most recent national census in 2010. The report is quite comprehensive and sheds some light on who pays support, how many children receive it and the averages for monthly and yearly child support payments.

The numbers show that the average monthly child support payment in America is $430. Children below the age of 21 receive $5,150 on average each year for support. Unsurprising to many is the news that male non-custodial parents provided more child support by percentage than female parents, though the difference was stark. Eighty-five percent of all U.S. child support payers were men and only 15 percent were women. The report also found that child support payments made by men were higher than a woman’s average of $3,500 in yearly financial contributions.