Charlotte Divorce Lawyer Blog

Flirty Texting Might Lead To Trouble During Divorce

Published on: May 20, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does a “No-Fault’ divorce mean in NC?”

In a bizarre case out of Maryland, a family court judge was forced to tackle the somewhat embarrassing question of what to do when two parties engaged in some rather adult conversations by text. The issue was that the two adults in question were in the process of divorcing one another, and the court had to decide whether their “sexting” was a problem that could derail the divorce.

The issue arose because under Maryland law to secure a no fault divorce a couple must have voluntarily separated from one another for 12 months prior to the filing of the application for divorce. This separation must include the parties living separate and apart without “cohabitating,” a phrase that has been interpreted to prohibit sexual relations between the parties.

The trouble began when Mr. Bergaris filed for divorce from his wife, claiming no fault. Mrs. Bergaris was evidently not interested in divorce and opposed the motion by arguing that during the previous 12 months she and her husband had exchanged numerous sexually explicit telephone communications and text messages. Mrs. Bergaris claimed that these messages meant that the grounds for divorce were invalid and that the request for a divorce should be denied.

Suicide Interferes With Man’s Divorce

Published on: May 15, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Do I need an attorney to get a Divorce in North Carolina?”

In a tragic case out of New York, one man recently lost a case where he tried to continue a divorce against his former wife who had recently taken her own life. The judge dismissed the matter, saying that prior case law has made clear that once a person dies the divorce case must also come to an end.

The case began back in 2012 when naval reservist Aleida Bordas filed for divorce from her husband of 13 years, David Bordas. Aleida claimed that the marriage was irretrievably broken and that she wanted out of the relationship as a result. The case slowly made its way through the court system until April of last year, when Aleida took her own life.

The suicide took many by surprise and resulted in the winding down of her divorce case, that is, until David realized that Aleida had made some important financial changes just before her death. David argued that these changes were made contrary to the standing order in place in the case that prevented either party from altering the financial status quo. As a result, David asked a judge to keep the divorce case open and undo the changes his former wife had made.

When Are The Worst Times To Divorce? :: Charlotte Divorce Lawyer

Published on: May 13, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does a “No-Fault’ divorce mean in NC?”

Though there’s certainly no good time to file for divorce, a recent article discussed some examples of especially bad times to decide to split up. Things such as health insurance, business matters and even emotional concerns can all play a role in deciding when a person finally pulls the trigger and files for a North Carolina divorce. The following are some factors that are worth considering when deciding when to move forward with a divorce.

Health issues

Though it may not occur to everyone, issues involving health insurance can actually be an important consideration to those following for divorce. If you and your spouse are no longer willing to work at improving the marriage you may be ready to get it over with and file. However, if health issues are at play, you might be better off waiting until they’ve been resolved.
Experts say that if a spouse is in the midst of receiving treatment for a health condition and that person does not have his or her own insurance, it may be best to wait until they have either finished treatment or secured a health insurance policy of their own before divorcing. Though you certainly have no obligation to wait, realize that especially for middle-aged couples, securing a new health insurance policy can be an expensive undertaking. Even healthy middle-aged individuals can expect to pay as much as $1,000 a month for a health insurance policy, a financial burden that might cripple someone trying to cover the costs associated with a divorce. Giving the other party a chance to get on their feet might be better than moving forward quickly.

Online Flirting Blamed For French Couple’s Divorce

Published on: May 8, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Does adultery affect my divorce case?”

Everyone knows that the Internet has led to changes in our daily life. Besides the ease of access to information, it’s also allowed many people to more easily meet and talk with others. Though it can be great to make new connections in some cases, it can spell the end of a marriage in others.

A good example of the latter happened recently when a French couple had their divorce finalized after the wife was found to have engaged in online flirtation with men she met on a Belgian dating website. The case surprised many because in France it marks the first time that online dating by itself amounted to sufficient grounds for divorce.

The case involved a 45-year-old mother of three, Nathalie, who cheated on her husband Bruno by flirting with men online. Though Nathalie was clearly caught engaging in online communication, she says that she never actually met any of the men in person, something that she felt meant that her actions could not rise to the level of infidelity.

Margarine Use Tied To Divorce? :: Charlotte Divorce Lawyer Family Law Attorney

Published on: May 6, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does uncontested divorce mean?”

The debate over using margarine or butter has been a heated one for decades, with those on either side marshaling facts about cholesterol, trans fats and flavor to bolster their arguments. A new chart might suggest those in favor of using real butter may be on to something. That’s because data seems to indicate that margarine use may be linked to increased risk of divorce.

A mathematician with a bone to pick over frequently misunderstood studies released a series of what he calls “spurious correlations” to highlight how ridiculous some of these attention-grabbing numbers can be. One such chart showed that there was a link between the declining divorce rate in Maine and the state’s decreased margarine consumption.

The reality is that rather than one factor being causally related to one another, the two are instead simply correlations. The problem is that many people incorrectly believe that because two variable move in a similar direction that they must be related. However, this appearance of relation does not mean that there is any actual connection between the two variables.
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Study Shows Some Couples May Not Hold To “In Sickness And In Health” Vow

Published on: May 1, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does uncontested divorce mean?”

In a bit of sad news out of Indiana University, a recent study indicates that serious illness can greatly increase the risk of divorce among older couples. The study interestingly found that the divorce rate doesn’t increase across the board, but instead only jumps when the illness strikes the wife.

Researchers from IU examined data from more than 2,700 couples married between 1992 and 2010. Among the thousands of cases, 1/3 of the marriages ended in divorce. The researchers found that of those who divorced, nearly half involved cases where the wife became seriously ill.

Some examples of the illnesses that caused such extreme marital stress include cancer, heart problems, lung disease and stroke. The researcher in charge of the study said that serious illness is a major stress on a relationship, not only on the person coping with the health issue. Health problems have long been known to cause steep declines in a person’s perceived marital quality, but the recent data surprised many by indicating that the gender of the sick person had a lot to do with the ultimate impact on a marriage.

The results showed specifically that when a man came down with a serious illness the couple was no more likely to divorce. However, when a woman becomes sick, that couple becomes substantially more likely to divorce. Researchers said that while the raw numbers might indicate that men are jerks, the reality is that the data is incomplete. For example, though divorce is more likely in these cases the numbers don’t show which party initiated the divorce, meaning men may not be the ones leaving their sick wives.

Lotto Winner Ordered To Share With His Ex Wife

Published on: April 29, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How long does getting a divorce take?”

A man in Indiana dodged a potentially costly bullet last week when a superior court judge ruled that he only needed to turn over a small fraction of his overall lottery winnings. The judge found that Jose Perez could keep the bulk of his $2 million scratch-off winnings due to the prolonged separation between he and his wife during which the money was won.

Perez and his wife, Maria Zepeda, married back in 2002 and only remained together a little over four years, physically (though not legally) separating in 2006. Though the two remained physically apart, maintaining separate residences, separate bank accounts and nearly totally cutting contact, they remained legally married.

Between 2006 and 2011, the two only spoke to one another two or three times in total, appearing by all outside accounts to be separate single adults. Then, in January 2011, Perez won $2 million in the Hoosier Lottery. That scratch-off ticket changed his life and caused him to finally divorce his estranged wife. Only a few months later, the divorce was finalized and Perez thought he was free and clear.

However, Zepeda didn’t take long to hear of the lotto winnings and, after consulting a family law attorney, decided she should stake her claim on some share of the winnings. Initially, Zepeda asked for $1.4 million of the $2 million haul, something the judge found ridiculous.

Paying The Legal Tab Of Your Soon-To-Be-Ex Spouse

Published on: April 24, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “When do you get alimony?”

According to a recent article, former Real Housewives of New York City star Bethenny Frankel is shelling out big money to continue fighting her long and already expensive divorce of Jason Hoppy. The case has drug on for more than 16 months already and shows no sign of coming to a close, something that cost Frankel a pretty penny.

According to recently released court papers, Frankel has been ordered to write her soon-to-be-ex a check for $100,000, money that is supposed to go to paying his mounting legal bills. Hoppy and his family law attorney petitioned the presiding judge to order the payment, claiming that Frankel’s wealth vastly exceeds Hoppy’s and, as a result, she should have to pay her former husband’s legal bills to ensure he is fairly represented during the contentious case.

Frankel, who sold her Skinny Girl line of alcoholic drinks for a reported $100 million, should have plenty of money to pay the tab. However, her lawyer insisted that the $100,000 be deducted from any future financial settlement worked out with Hoppy. So far, a deal seems like a long way off, with the two reportedly far apart with regards to alimony, child support and division of Frankel’s Skinny Girl money.

Hoppy argues that he is entitled to a good chunk of Frankel’s empire, saying that he met her as she was creating the brand that would go on to earn her millions and that he helped her establish her company. Frankel claims that her earnings are her own and that her business never had any direct ties to her husband, something she believes should result in her walking away with everything.

Americans Split Up Far More Often Than Birds

Published on: April 22, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “Do I need an attorney to get a Divorce in North Carolina?”

As most people have heard, the divorce rate in this country hovers around 50 percent. The exact number is hard to nail down, mainly because of poor data and the complicated nature of tracking and measuring marriage and divorce. However, a new book called “The Thing With Feathers” discusses birds and their amazing tendency to mate for life.

Though monogamy is rare in the animal world, Noah Strycker, author of the book, found that a surprising number of bird species appear to be fans of lifelong commitment, some even more so than humans. Strycker conducted research on more than 100 species of birds and found that of them all, the albatross was the most remarkably committed.

Strycker discovered that after a lengthy courtship period, sometimes lasting as long as 15 years, the albatross pairs up and that these pairings last until one partner dies. Unlike humans, the albatross is a 100 percent faithful animal. And lest you think these matches are merely short-term conveniences, researchers say that the pairings can last for up to five or six decades given the long lifespan of the albatross.

Though the albatross does set a good example of fidelity, the same cannot be said for every animal with wings. Flamingos are notorious playboys, with a 99 percent divorce rate. Piping Plovers breakup 67 percent of the time. On the more successful end, ducks are slightly more committed than humans, with a relationship failure rate of only 40 percent. Mallard couples remain together 91 percent of the time and swans manage to hang in there in 95 percent of cases.

Keep Calm When Discussing Money And Divorce

Published on: April 17, 2014 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “What does a “No-Fault’ divorce mean in NC?”

A recent article in the Wall Street Journal discussed the sometimes-disastrous combination that financial decisions and strong emotions can cause in divorce cases. Experts usually advise individuals to only make important financial decisions with a calm, level head, but during a divorce this can be easier said than done.

Given how easy it is for couples to conflate emotion and money, it is critical to hire and rely on an experienced North Carolina family law attorney who you trust to shepherd your case through the process. By hiring a skilled professional, you can ensure that decisions are being made by a rational outsider advocating on your behalf.

A common example of a financial mistake that emotions can cause include costly and unnecessary fights over relatively insignificant personal items. All too often, angry couples decide to square off when dividing the contents of their life. A wronged party can feel indignant about letting things go to the spouse that he or she blames for the demise of the relationship. In these cases, thousands of dollars and countless hours are wasted arguing over furniture or plates, even toiletries and souvenirs. Think long and hard before engaging in a scuffle over such relatively inexpensive belongings and remember that almost everything can be replaced.

Another good example of emotions overriding good sense occurs when one party, many times a woman, tries to stay in the marital residence at all costs. Often this happens because the woman believes it is in the best interest of the kids to maintain stability, but this can backfire quickly if the party left with the house is not truly able to afford it alone.